I am in the process of moving over here.
What I do with this space is still up in the air (because I could mirror things over here, but I'm not sure why since almost everyone who reads/read here is on LJ already).
If you have some deep abiding antipathy to LiveJournal, now would be the time to speak :-)
--Why do I insist on writing about things I don't know anything about? Like South Dakota and Afghanistan and burning down tool sheds. On the other hand, I now know how to *actually* win a fist fight. So, that's good.
--It was above freezing today! From noon until, like...now. Awesome!
--Blue and Billie and I went tracking. Blue is an awesome little tracking maniac. I believe it's because of the lime-green harness. If I ever remember to take my camera, I will post pictures.
--I want to get at least two stories in the mail this month. Apparently no one will buy them if you don't actually finish them and send them out.
--Books I've read recently or am currently reading:
--As always I'm sure there is something I'm forgetting...
As you can see, my life is a constant whirlwind
...is how everyone should spend the holiday weekend.
Spent Friday making puppy visits, yesterday at a dog show, and today we went for a walk in the park.
Otherwise, I have been pondering novel developments and think I'm starting to get a handle on who my main character is, what she wants, and what she's going to have to do to get there. I hope this will translate soon into words on the page (although, let me tell you it ain't easy typing with a puppy in your lap).
[My grocery total is $36.63]
Checkout kid: Hey your total's a palindrome!
Me: I think I should get a discount.
Checkout Kid: if I were in charge you'd get a 75% discount!
Grocery Bagging Kid: But if you actually did that, people would come to the store and buy palindromic amounts of groceries and you'd have to give them all 75% discounts!
Checkout Kid: Nah, figuring the taxes would totally mess them up.
Wow, I haven't updated here in awhile. So, some quick updates to be followed perhaps, by a post that isn't updates sometime soon.
--Went to a dog show in Wisconsin where Billie earned her Rally Advanced title and many amazing prizes.
--Went to a tracking test in Illinois where Billie did not get a tracking title because her owner (me) did not trust her dog
--Went to Indiana and saw puppies (yay, puppies!). They were the cutest puppies ever in the history of the world. I should be getting one in about three weeks.
--Read some books
--Did some writing
--Went to western NY to visit family. Saw two of my brothers, my mother, an aunt and uncle and possibly other people I've forgotten.
[I wrote this about five days ago and forgot to post it. And, luckily, because I have no life, it is still pretty much valid]
I have been re-reading Harry Potter. And reading The Wisdom of Crowds, Terra Antarctica, and Stay by Nicola Griffith.
I've also been watching Ice Road Truckers, Deadliest Catch, Clatterford, the second season of Avatar, the Air Bender, and Pinky and the Brain. I'm not sure if this means I have eclectic tastes or no taste whatsoever.
Billie and I are going to the hospital about once a week right now for therapy dog visits which I think she enjoys. Also, it's kind of fun to watch people's reactions to dogs in the hospital (most people are either surprised or surprised and happy. Although there's one guy who's really really grumpy about the whole thing.)
I have a new computer, a new Airport Base Station (because my old one was eleventy billion years old) with a USB port where I have hooked up the hard drive with all the stuff from my old computer.
Billie and I have already been tracking and it's hotter than blue blazes out so while I'm sure I could be working on my yard, I'm not going to.
I have almost no excuse not to work on some sort of writing today.
I do have to go out and buy groceries sometime though.
It is also Iowa Straw Poll day and OMG my eyes are burning from all the Brownback, Ron Paul, Some Guy I Never Heard of signs.
I am somewhat reasonably certain that I have backed up all the data on my harddrive.
Word of advice. Never ever (ever!) take a Macintosh laptop apart. I mean ever. Unless you have a) all the tools in the world, b) a step by step pictographic guide, and c) aren't particularly worried about putting it back together again.
Seriously.
I like Macs. Have used one as my home computer for years. But, really, could you make the hard drive any harder to get to, Apple?
So the beginning of the week (Saturday), as you know, was crap. And at the end of the week (Friday) my computer died.
Okay, it's not totally dead and I'm reasonably sure I can get all the data off it, but it is currently useless because the wire that connects the screen to the computer is broken and so there's nothing on the screen.
Most everything is backed up though I am not entirely sure I have my latest story or the beginning of the novel. And there are some emails I should answer, but can't because I don't have the email addresses right now. But the only thing that would really make me unhappy to lose would be my photos (which I *think* are backed up, but I'm not 100 percent sure).
So, I guess I'll be buying a new computer soon, which I sort of wanted to do, but also sort of wanted to use the money for other things.
Ok, I watched this movie last night and--good, lord--are there actually families like this? Because this story is all about this family nagging the forty-year-old extremely good looking (Diane Lane) and apparently extraordinarily well-paid pre-school teacher into dating again after her divorce. And by nagging, I mean never talking about anything else, ever, posting pictures on her refrigerator of marginally eligible men, and calling her at all hours of the day and night to see if she's dating yet. Because in this movie it's clear that 'I just want you to be happy' means, 'I can't stand to see you living your life without attaching yourself to a man'. What they tell her is to get a life and it's clear that one cannot have one (a life) if one isn't dating a man.
Also, where do these people get their money? Diane Lane is a pre-school teacher living in California in a huge 1920s bungalow that would cost more than a single pre-school teacher in Iowa could afford, let alone California. John Cusack's character builds boats that he never sells and lives in a huge and beautiful loft with a huge and beautiful work space downstairs. He does nothing else and there's no indication that he's ever done anything else. Just builds boats. And doesn't sell them.
Stockard Channing is the best character in the movie as a love interest for Diane Lane's character's father, Christopher Plummer. But although Christopher Plummer is allowed to date billions of women and invite them all to his house at the same time (which the women put up with because in California it appears that it's against the law for any woman ever to date any man who is younger than she is. And since they all must have a man all the time--which we learned from the previous family intervention scene--they just have to put up with dating a man who has several dates at once). Stockard Channing's character handles this with a fair amount of grace (as she's the most mature character in the movie), but good lord, tell him to go jump.
The women act like idiots. The men act like idiots. And I don't get why anyone would want to be with anyone. The best couple in the movie is sixty-one year old Stockard Channing's character and the fifteen year old who meets her on the internet and thinks she's sixteen (because he read her age wrong) and 'so mature.'
1. I worked two weekends ago, I spent last weekend mostly on my back because I hurt it the weekend before, and I have to work all weekend this weekend. In other news, I'm pretty sure I'm going to take the Thursday and Friday after the 4th off.
2. I sat down after work and decided to write out the plot so far in the Sucky Novel of Doom. Imagine my surprise to discover that there is no plot! This may be why it sucks. I have premise, characters, backstory and stuff-that-happens. I believe I might profitably spend a couple of days thinking about the plot.
3. I finished converting 'What Makes a River' to past tense and cutting a little though perhaps not enough. Why I am working on this story I don't know since I can't sell it unless I sell 'How to Hide Your Heart'.
4. Started a new story, which may turn out not to be a story and almost certainly won't be finished for awhile and got (what I hope is) a decent idea for how to make 'Interacting with the Neighbors...' work as a story.
5. While I was lying on my back I watched 42- and 49- up. Someday I will have an actual post about these movies. For now, I'll just say that though I identify most with the Yorkshire farm boy gone to academia, I fear my life most resembles that of the not actually crazy (probably) guy, except that I have mostly always had a job.
6. Since I gave a talk a couple of weeks ago on social networks, I've started playing with Facebook and LibraryThing. It's extremely telling that the thing I like the most about LibraryThing is that I can go in and select the 'right' book cover for my books. Because if they don't have the right cover, it's as if they aren't even my books.
It will come as no surprise to learn that my inner book locater is completely visual and spatial.
7. The Ames School District closed two elementary schools two years ago and now are proposing to bus elementary kids five miles out of town to another district for a couple of years so they can remodel and relieve overcrowding.
8. They are also proposing to build an aquatic recreation center on the flood plain (which, while weirdly appropriate is stupid and annoying) and to tear down 8 houses to build a left turn lane. The people whose houses are being offered up for sacrifice are really, really annoyed (and in many ways it's hard to blame them because they will go from having a decent centrally located home to in all likelihood being unable to afford to buy another home in the city at all). Also, I go through this intersection every day at 5:00 and, really? Not the traffic problem of the century.
9. I actually don't have a number 9 (or a number 10 depending on how you think of it), but by the time I got to about six things I decided to see if I could get to 10.
10. If I were on LJ and could lock posts, I'd tell you other things, but one of them is sad and the other one is whiny so consider yourself spared.....
My new theory of the Internet is that everyone eventually ends up looking at happy puppies. You'll be doing research or looking for information or just randomly clicking and suddenly...OMG Happy Puppies!!!!!
It's what glues the Internet together.
I would put pictures of happy puppies in this very post, but I'm too lazy to get up and get my camera and cable and transfer said pictures over.
I have had a weird couple of days, some of which I can't comment on, some of which I don't want to comment on yet, but will at some point. Among other things, I gave a talk at a national conference but because I couldn't actually be at the conference I did it via videoconferencing. Word is that it went really well and I got great feedback, but really, don't ever do this unless you have no other choice. If you rely in any way on audience response (eye contact, smiles, nodding heads, frowns, crossed arms, sleeping in the back of the room) and I do, well, you get *nothing* from a video conference. There's no audience response. This particular talk was compounded by the fact that I was showing two videos that were several minutes each and at my end that was just blank silent time. So, yeah, you're giving a talk and then you stop in the middle for five minutes, then you start up again, and then there's time for three questions and some talking in the back of the room that you can't hear and then you're done.
It's better than a poke in the eye with a sharp stick, though.
Just in case you were wondering.
Okay....one Happy Puppy picture:
A month or so ago, I lost an insurance reimbursement check. And, although it wasn't a huge check, I really could have used it, seeing as how I owned two houses at the time. I knew that assuming no one else found it and cashed it, that the insurance company would reissue it, but I hadn't pursued that yet, though I did occasionally think fondly of that check and the things I could do with the money, if I had it.
So, today, I was taking some things out of my knapsack from this weekend and putting them in my purse for tomorrow and I looked down at my hands and there was the check.
In my hands.
From out of, apparently, nowhere. There would have been no reason on Earth that it would have been in my knapsack. And it wasn't in my purse (because I looked in there a hundred times). And I didn't actually pull it out of my knapsack, anyway. It was just there in my hands with my phone and my wallet and my notebook.
Oh, mysteries of life, never stop messing with my head.
I just wasted precious minutes of my life trying to post comments to SarahP's journal. They were Brilliant comments, too, with a capital 'B'. They would have changed lives and altered the course of nations.
Angels might also have cried.
I spent this weekend scorekeeping for a local agility trial. Billie got to hang out with me there, though we did not run. She is not really a master of coordination (because: medication) and, frankly, neither am I. I managed to get lost on a simple right turn last year at a Rally trial. But it was fun and it mostly didn't rain and it wasn't too hot, which in Iowa is about all you can ask of the weather in June.
I've got approximately 3,800 words written on the new novel. It's currently titled 'The Ghosts of Fear' but I'm considering changing it to 'Resolutions'. It may change titles several more times before I'm done.
Old house closed today.
My old mortgage is paid off. My bridge loan is paid off. And I have deposited money in the bank.
In a comedic ending that would never play in fiction, I managed to lose the set of house keys that I have been using for twenty years as I was on my way to turn them over to the realtor (no, seriously, like, lost). Fortunately this was not the only set of keys to the house (also, fortunately--although I suspect that they are either at work, at my new house or in the landfill, in which case it doesn't matter--they have no identifiers on them at all so no one would ever be able to tell that they were house keys let alone what house they go to).
But that aside, it is done. And once again, I own just the one house. Woo-freakin'-hoo! :-)
I sold my house (Finally! Hallelujah!!!!!)
I got a decent price. And, more importantly, survived having the home inspection on the wettest day of the last ten years (and before you ask if the basement was wet--yes, of course, the basement was wet--flood plain, five inches of rain, house built in the 20s--I'm willing to bet there wasn't a basement in my part of town that wasn't).
They did ask for some things to be done before closing, all of them reasonable and all of them doable.
And we close before the end of May!!!
"Sixth Street always goes under first."
"Yeah, and 13th Street is last."
"Not 24th?"
"No, because it goes 6th, South Duff, 30, 24th, then 13th. Then you have to drive 40 miles north to go a mile and a half east.
Plus, don't forget Lincolnway."
"Yeah, but that's, like, a whole 'nother flood."
==
"This is as much water as '93."
"Not even. It wasn't even as much water as '96. Because in '96, the horse pasture was completely underwater and that storm drain thing was shooting water straight up into the air."
"What about the canoes in the grocery store?
"That was '93."
But, really, almost no streets went under this time. Kayaks in the park and sandbagging (with mulch!) at the pizza place. Wet basements everywhere. Because that's why we build on the flood plain.
And I am so lame, I have no pictures.
Or at least the four or five people who read here occasionally....
Keep your fingers crossed and wish really, really hard.
Thanks!
My wireless works in my back yard. Yay!! (I need a brighter screen, tho)
Yesterday I talked to a physics class about writing SF & F, which was fun (SarahP, tell JohnP that it was an *all!girl* physics class--seriously).*
Billie did her first pet therapy visit at the hospital which went really well, although there were no patients. Tomorrow we are visiting Girl Scouts.
I am currently working on 'What Makes a River' and the revisions for 'Cowgirls in Space' (or I would be if I weren't typing this).
I probably have other news as well, but I'm pretty sure all of it is just as exciting as this news so I'll save it for another time.
*(Okay, it was a physics class for non-majors and there were two boys, but all the rest were girls)
Gratuitous dog picture (so at least this post is not a total waste of your time):
I get this letter from the county treasurer's office that I haven't paid my property taxes which would be, you know, bad.
I pay them into escrow, so it's not like I'm personally responsible and my mortgage is with the credit union which is, all in all, really good. I call them and then say we paid them on the 12th of last month. They call the Treasurer's office, who says--well, hmmm...we applied those taxes to the other house.
So, I'm thinking...let me get this straight. My other house has an eleven hundred dollar credit and the taxes have been paid TWICE in the month of March (according to you), and when you saw that this house had No Taxes Paid On It, it didn't occur to you to think...hmmm, perhaps we made a mistake? My favorite part is that they cannot, apparently, just move that money to the correct location. I (well, the credit union) have to pay the taxes again and they will send the credit union a check for the wrongly credited taxes. They damn well better credit me back the interest.
In other news my assessment hardly went up at all so at least they won't be getting any more taxes from me.
In completely other news, Billie had her first hospital therapy visit today and was her lovely charming self. We're definitely looking forward to more.
Also, I've decided that 'Two is Not a Pattern' is not the next Beth/Paul not-vampire story, which is probably why I was having so much trouble writing it. The story I'm currently working on is: 'What Makes A River':
Paul sends her an email and it drops her jaw because--first-- how does he know her email address and --second--why. Because he never made any promises, never even said--thanks for helping me out that time. But he does--he sends her email. Are you okay? Is all it says. Three words and a question mark and she can't figure out what it means. Is it a general question--in this moment on this day. Does it mean he was thinking about her--hey, just want you to know I'm here. Because it's not that he found her attractive because she's not attractive. Does he know about the Thing in the lake that's not a merman? Is he asking if she's safe?
She wants to ping him back, to say--goddamn you, there's a Thing in the lake and you're a hunter. Come here and hunt it. Leave me alone, leave me out, leave me ignorant and alone. Except she doesn't want to be alone. And she can't be ignorant--can't unknow what she knows anymore.
Damn him.
Damn the world.
She answers him--I'm fine, how are you.
For those who worry about such things (...chance...) it will probably (almost certainly) not be in present tense when it's done.
So, I have been following the mighty battle of SFWA presidents and it is clear that this is a battle of the YOUNG vs the OLD. Never mind that some of the YOUNG are in fact old and some of the OLD are clearly young. That is not important.
So, the first question you should ask yourself as you're preparing to vote in this critical election is--am I YOUNG or OLD.
A quiz to help you with this important question:
--If you have ever said, 'Hey, you, get off my lawn!' Stop taking this quiz right now because you win! You are OLD. (I once ran outside in my stocking feet in the middle of winter and told a guy to damn well stop leaning over the fence to pet my dog, but this doesn't count because the dog was a (albeit friendly) Rottweiler and the guy was a freaking idiot.)
--If you have ever said, 'You think that sounds like a good idea but we tried that in 1942 and war broke out.' Ha ha ha, you are OLD.
--If you have said, 'Who are you?' to someone who is arguing with you online and has just given you their name. You are...well, hmmm, you could actually be either YOUNG or OLD.
--If you actually use RSS feeds, Second Life, Live Journal, My Space, YouTube, wikis, Technorati, IceRocket, Windows Mobile 5, Google Alerts or you know what Web 2.0 is, you are YOUNG.
--If you constantly try to divide people and/or things into two groups and boil complex issues down into the FORS and AGAINSTS, you are OLD. Jeez, what's with that? Just stop it already.*
--If you have already switched to Windows Vista, you are either YOUNG or insane.
--If you have no idea what Windows Vista is, you are OLD.**
--If you keep trying things when OLD people tell you Straight Out that it will NOT work and it is WRONG. Then you are YOUNG. And not just YOUNG, but a Whippersnapper. And no one wants to be a Whippersnapper. No one.
*Dividing people up into YOUNG vs OLD does not count. Really. It totally doesn't. Like, at all.
**(If you have a Macintosh you will never be old, because that is the Mighty Macintosh Secrit--shhh, don't tell anyone!)
--My old house still hasn't sold (and Francisco Franco is still dead). My realtor says that there have been 7 showings in three days so, you know, buy it, someone.
--This house was my dream house two years ago. It's the house I didn't get (because other people bought it for more money than I could) and it's the house that got me on the year and a half house hunting that culminated in me buying my current house.
--And, honestly, I like my new house even better than that house. Except the yard. Because whereas my yard is very nice, that house has a yard that is all the AWESOME. It's a half acre, wooded, deep, deep lot.
--Except that yard is not fenced. At all.
--Except that house is now listed at $50,000 more than I paid for this house (actually more than $50,000 more), which may not be much in California housing dollars but is a lot of money in Iowa dollars.
--And no one keeps that house more than two years (I have no idea why because it's really a very nice house), but they don't.
--And I like my house. A lot. And I like the fact that I didn't pay $50,000 more for it. And I didn't have to pay to put up a fence. And my current plans are to stay quite a bit longer than two years.
--So, huh.
--And good :-)
--I still have not sold my old house. Last week during the open house, two different real estate agents were also showing the house. It's like a ride at the amusement park--maybe I should give up trying to sell it and just charge admission.
--John Henry had a mostly clean bill of health at his latest oncology checkup. His chest x-ray was clear. They found a mass on his chest near his left front leg, but when they aspirated it it came back with no significant findings, which is good.
--Billie had to have minor surgery for an abscessed anal gland of all things. It went well, she's doing fine. It didn't bother her because she's--by god--a Rottweiler and they laugh in the face of minor surgery.
--I finished the first draft of Cowgirls in Space and am sort of working on Two is Not a Pattern or I would be if I knew more about the plot and not so much about the thematic interactions.
--I recently read The Confession by James McGreevey, former governor of New Jersey about which I'd like to write up a review, but I haven't yet and am currently reading Fiasco, the best part of which so far is a quote from a former Army officer calling Wolfowitz, 'crack-smoking stupid.'
Whenever a reasonable person gets into a discussion with an asshat, there's always a moment where the reasonable person has an urge to apologize. Resist this urge with every fiber of your being!
Other reasonable people will think--wow, that was a really reasonable and mature thing to do, particularly in the face of asshattery. The asshat will think--ha, ha, I win!
When I lived in New Hampshire it got dark at 4:30 in the afternoon in winter, but the sun was up by 7:00 AM. When I lived in Indiana, it didn't get light until 8:00 in the morning. That was way more depressing than having it get dark at 4:30. I love that time in spring when it slowly, finally, starts getting light in the mornings. And I love it when it's light before I even get up (this possibly goes back to my childhood getting up and milking cows when it was so dark and so cold that you could have convinced me that the sun was never going to rise again).
So, now we have gone to Daylight Savings Time even earlier, which plunges us back into darkness in the mornings. And doesn't save me any energy because I'm awake in the mornings *and* the evenings. Go figure.
This post has been brought to you by the Society of Cranky Old Men and Women (Our motto: Hey, you, get off my lawn!)
I wrote this in Chainsaw on Hand:
If it were suddenly summer in South Dakota after a week of minus two, you would hate it--it would be too hot and too humid and frightening, like the world was ending in fire instead of ice. In South Dakota in winter, you don’t think about seventy degrees or eighty degrees. As far as you’re concerned the tropics don’t exist; palm trees, blue waters--they’re just a television fantasy. Twenty degrees would be enough. If the temperature got up to twenty degrees, you’d unbutton your jacket and shed an entire layer of long underwear. At twenty degrees you’d walk outside without your head covered, with your face turned toward the sun, like you were living in Bermuda. Twenty degrees in South Dakota in winter would give you enough hope to go on.
And as we learned today in Iowa, when it is suddenly 45 after a month where the average temperature is 12, you can walk around pretty comfortably without a coat on (some people can walk around with tee-shirts and shorts on, but the jury's still out on whether they are comfortable or not).
...that one of the top ten passwords is 'Password1'?
Yeah, it used to be 'password' but then systems started requiring both letters and numbers and people got all clever and decided to add a '1'. And, yeah, totally secure now.
Also, 'monkey' is a top ten password.
On that same note, my online banking system has now gone to a setup that lets you makeup your own security questions, so now instead of trying to remember which dog you put down for 'What is your favorite pet's name?' You can put down questions that you'll not only remember the answer to, but only you will know, like
--What is John Henry's oncologist's last name?
--Who was my first grade teacher?
--What was the name of the street I grew up on before they changed its name
--Who lived across the street from me when I was six
Note: since you make up the questions, don't ask yourself questions you don't actually know the answer to
Note the second: these are not my actual security questions
Note the third: if your password is 'Password1' or 'monkey'--yeah--change it now.
So, the average temperature for last month was 12 degrees F.
Today it's been icing since early this morning. Later, it's supposed to snow. Fun for all...
I'm currently working on Cowgirls in Space, which I will be able to finish as soon as I remember the One Important Thing. I hope to work on Two is Not a Pattern later.
Then, perhaps, the logistics of getting the three-legged dog down the ice-covered steps (I'm not particularly worried about him on the ground as he has more traction on ice than I do, but the steps...ohhh, baby).
Gratuitous John Henry picture:
You should not be saying the low for the day is going to be 14 when it's currently -2.
So now Movable Type is saying all comments everywhere are gone. Except it's, at least temporarily, showing the one Sarah posted yesterday. And the spam is, of course, everywhere (not where anyone but me sees it, but still).
And, yeah, I have been thinking of moving to Live Journal lately....
Guy: It's cold!
Me: That's why god invented long underwear.
Guy: Long underwear! I would rather wear snow pants. [note that we are inside at this time]
Me: I would rather wear long underwear and snow pants and be warm.
Guy: Hmmmm.....
So, it says there are comments for this post and this one. And I've gotten the email notices for them so I have, indeed, actually seen the comments, but they are not on the comnents list in the movable type back end and they are not there when I click on the link to go to comments on the blog.
They're like invisible comments.
So, it snowed again last night and most of this morning. I'd guess we got six to eight inches of new snow.
Billie and I went tracking over at the cross country fields [insert rant here about people who drive on snow as if there isn't any snow. Also people who think they know how to drive on snow but don't], which was a lot more work for me than for her.
We took some things out to the new dog building. Billie played with a boxer and a miniature pinscher. Playing with the boxer always ends better than playing with the miniature pinscher.
Then I came home and idly waited until they plowed my street [insert rant here about how idiotically they plow the streets here] but gave up about 2:00 at which point the plow came and plowed the street about a dozen times and I decided not to plow the end of my driveway after all because who cares but me and I have four-wheel drive.
The End.
So, I get up this morning and it's snowed...
...which wasn't a big surprise because it was snowing last night. But anyway, I have breakfast and figure out where my boots are and go outside to shovel (and don't think about that other house, that's on the corner).
And as I'm just getting started, ny neighbor from across the street who I haven't met before comes over and says, 'You know, I have nothing to do and I would love to snow blow your sidewalk and your driveway.'
And who am I to argue with that.
So, I finish shoveling the back walk and sweep the front and back steps and let the dogs out and in. Then, I come back inside and take off boots and snow pants and have second breakfast. And I am sitting on the couch definitely not thinking about the fact that I own two houses and, really, I should do something about that other one (did I mention it's on a corner?), when one of the people I work with calls and says, "I was just driving around with my snow blower and wondered if you needed any sidewalks cleared.' (no really that's pretty much what he said).
So now all my sidewalks are done!!! Yay, me!
Also, check out the candy version of the Battle for Helm's Deep. Things like this give me a deep abiding fath in humanity....
...but really I have no news (seriously)
--I still own two houses
--I've gotten two rejections since the first of the year and have three stories in the mail
--Twice in my writing career I've been told that my story was very similar to another story I've never read.
--Billie's tracking certification, of which I have two certificates remaining, runs out the *day* before the next tracking test I could conceivably enter so I will have to re-certify her (this would, of course, be moot if she'd passed at one of the two tests we got into last year)
--I am currently working on two short stories (a relatively small number, but if I finish them it will be a triumph of something)
--I realized this morning that 'Two is Not a Pattern' probably has something to do with statistics (also not-vampires) so it's a good thing I was a statistics analyst once upon a time.
And two may not be a pattern, but apparently it's a theme....
So, I started the year with two dogs and I finished the year with the same two dogs! Yay me!
Really that was the best part of 2006, but also:
--Magic in a Certain Slant of Light was reprinted in two year's best anthos
--I bought a fabbo new house (I've only bought two houses in my life and as of right now I still own both of them--yeah, this isn't as great as the buying a new house part, but I expect it will change in 2007)
--I did not manage a short story a month but I did finish (counts up on fingers) six stories which is a lot for me. And three of them are even polished enough to put in the mail.
--I met a lot of terrific writers from Iowa City and spent far more time than I ever imagined in the Jewel of the Prairie. Also chocolate milkshakes.
--I finished off 2006 by going tracking in the (not quite freezing) rain through dense underbrush. But I was wearing my awesome new jacket which was excellent although now I need new rain pants so I can have a complete SYSTEM and weather can never touch me again!!!
Also other stuff I'm not thinking of at the moment.
1. A county extension agent
(sure there was what's his name on Green Acres. But it was Green Acres, for god sake. It was thirty years ago and, you know, Green Acres).
2. Non-bucolic farmers
As in farmers who act like farmers who've been to four years of college might act (also not desperate farmers sadly losing their entire life and livelihood to a heartless banker in three days).
3. Professional women who are older than twelve.
I watched two disks worth of Bones before I had to give up because it's made fairly clear in the pilot that the main female character is a PhD expert who is probably not yet 30. And I was willing to suspend my disbelief because I like a good forensic bone story as much as the next person until the episode where she said that she understood about working with dead children because she was at Waco. Waco was in 1993, dude! You were, what? 15? Yeah, I don't think so. Someday I will probably talk about the other things that bugged me about that show (surprisingly not the science because for some odd reason I just let that go--well, okay not really because I hate the part of science where the main characters know every single thing in their field and never look at a book, read a journal or consult with other experts. Yeah, that's believable.)
4. People older than 35 who have been on teh intranets.
I was watching NCIS(yeah, I have netflix and a crime show jones) and Mark Harmon's character was all massively multiplayer-whahhh? And then the Naval Captain was all--hey I know whtat that is cuz I have kids and you don't--hahaha. And then Ducky who would totally be interested in World of Warcraft if someone just showed him how these damn devil machines work ,said--oh you crazy kids and your wacky inventions. Luckily they have a young kicky Goth girl who knows not just forensics and is a genius--genius!--in the lab, but she is young (twelve year old professional) so she totally knows how to use computers and hack her way right up to the top of the MMORPG--cuz she is the youngster. And those young people they so get the typing and the interacting and shit.
...that the things that get the most comments around here involve upside down dogs, flat squirrels and electric peeing.
You may now expect this sort of discourse to escalate in the coming year.
Tom's comment below reminded me of another conversation I once had with the 'Rottweilers are going to kill you' guy. I thought I'd posted this one before, but can't find it on a search so here it is:
Him (on the phone): I need a videoconferencing account
Me: Ok. Are you going to be putting on meetings because you don't need an account just to attend.
Him: Well, if I don't have an account, how do I get my name to show up instead of 'Guest' when I join the conference?
Me: Type your name instead of typing 'Guest.'
Him: Oh. But, okay, how can people see me when I'm in the conference?
Me: Turn your camera on.
Him: I don't have a camera.
Me: Then people can't see you.
Him: People can see me.
Me: Then you have a camera.
[...Three more rounds of this exact same conversation...]
Me: Hmmm...look, do you have a webcam?
Him: Yes.
Me: That's a camera.
Him: No, it's not.
Me [swearing in my head]: Just use the web cam
Him: Ok. Why didn't you just say that in the first place?
Me: [Falls off chair]
Here's a story: One day this guy who I've worked with (though he's not in my office) for many years comes into my office and sits down, as he has often done over the years. As we're talking this time, he looks up and notices that I have several pictures of Rottweilers in the room. Why he's never noticed this before, I have no idea.
"Are those your dogs?" he asks
"Yes, I have two Rottweilers."
"Those dogs are going to kill you," he says.
"No, actually, they're not," I say. "I've had Rottweilers for sixteen years."
"They will kill you," he insists. "They always turn on their owners and kill them. You need to get rid of them now before they kill you."
Me [laughing]
But here's the thing: this guy knows nothing about Rottweilers. He certainly doesn't know anything like as much as I know about them. But he didn't say, 'I'm surprised you have Rottweilers.' Or 'I've heard they're mean.' Or, 'wow, aren't you afraid those things will kill you.' He said, "They'll kill you." Like he knew what he was talking about. Like I couldn't possibly know what I was talking about. Like assertion and experience are the same.
I have to say, I hate that. And it's endemic on the internets. People confidently and with gusto declare things as fact that are patently no such thing. And you (if you, say, have a fever and are temporarily insane) end up arguing with them as if they have some legitimate point, when really they have no freaking idea what they're talking about. They simply have command of language and a big enough ego that they sound as if they do (or, also, they're really good at yelling louder than everyone else).
People don't always end up looking like experts because they are, in fact, experts. They way too often end up in that position because they sound like they know what they're talking about. That (among a number of other reasons) is why so-called meritocracies end up being no such thing. That's why experts are overrated. That's why when someone says 'I know what I'm talking about and here's why.' One might, you know, actually listen to them.
A cozy fire in the fireplace and two dogs sleeping on the couch with me.
Plus, my kitchen ceiling no longer leaks...
Totally the best weather combination ever.
Also, it was 70 on Wednesday.
Update: There is now actual snow on the ground and plenty of it. Sadly, the thunder has stopped.
What is it with people who leave their shopping carts in the checkout lane and just walk away with their packages (and by 'in the lane' I mean they themselves had to walk around it to get to their bags at the end of the lane)? Do they think some magic grocery fairy is going to come and move it for them? For anyone who wonders--when you leave your shopping cart directly in the checkout lane--THE PERSON BEHIND YOU HAS TO MOVE IT!
Get a freaking clue.
I took my car in today to get it worked on because lately when I use the turn signal the clicking sound continues even after the turn signal is off. But I actually ended up getting new brake pads and rotors on the front because it wasn't actually making the clicking sound today so they were mostly guessing what would fix it and, since the turn signal is working, and the brakes were clearly heading toward the not-working stage, it seemed the better choice. Of course, it also cost twice as much as fixing the turn signal.
And by the way, I hate with the mighty hate of a thousand suns, television sets in public waiting areas. Today I was, at least, smart enough to take my iPod with me and I still managed to see far more of Regis and Kelly (only with out Regis), the Price is Right, and the Young and the Restless than I really wanted to see. Although now I know what that guy from Project Runway looks like wearing Crocs, how much a pull-behind camper costs and that some guy I don't know is eloping to New Mexico with some woman I don't know (I mean, really, I'm assuming I heard wrong--who would elope to New Mexico?)
Also, my realtor told me that someone looked at my old house this week and is really interested, but wants to get their life in order first. My god, if I have to wait until someone has their life in order, the house may never sell.
Well, as you might have guessed, I have moved and am somewhat unpacked and mostly settled (though my old house still hasn't sold). I'll get some pictures up on Flickr (maybe tonight) of both just moved and mostly settled. Surprisingly, they don't actually resemble each other.
There's not much else to report. No writing news of note. No dog news of note. I'm in the process of revising The Whale's Lover (finally) and I've sort of started a new story called Interacting with the Neighbors on a Downward Slide to Hell which is not horror and probably doesn't involve Hell, but is, of course, totally spec-ficcy.
I also sent a bio to Sheila at Asimovs for Chainsaw on Hand, which will be in the March, 2007 issue.
--Had another open house today. My realtor didn't leave me a note, so I don't know how it went but I will assume all manner of excellence since I have no evidence to the contrary.
--John Henry got to spend his time at the new house and apparently it was so awesome and comfortable that BIllie and I woke him out of a sound sleep when we came back.
--Billie and I went to the dog show in Des Moines today where Billie got first place in Rally Novice with a perfect score of 100. In Rally, perfect scores are surprisingly not all that uncommon, but it was a big surprise to me (my primary goal for the day was: Have Fun) and I was very pleased.
It occurred to me tonight as I was walking Billie that I lived on a farm growing up in New York and I've lived in a city the entire time I've been in Iowa.
Stereotypes are the bomb.
--Got my slush bomb story back from GVG. Too much glitter (not really :-) He just didn't like it well enough). I'm thinking I'll send it to Asimov's next.
--John Henry had his cancer check up this week. His lungs are still clear and they say everything looks good. Yay him!!! This makes 16 months since he was diagnosed and had his leg chopped off (I feel weird saying he 'lost his leg;' it's not like we misplaced it or something).
--My realtor is having another open house tomorrow. Billie and I are going to the dog show.
I didn't get any pictures of the tree before it came down, but when I was over at the house this morning, I took this picture:
As we can all now see, the tree guy was totally right. Basically, this tree was a big rotten hole holding up a bunch of very large and heavy branches:
Also, this is the big tree limb that started it all (it doesn't look that big in this picture but the limb actually extends clear to the other side of the garage, plus they've already cut a bunch of branches off):
So, I have my new house, which is lovely. And my current--soon to be old--house, which is also lovely (someone Buy It--this is your subliminal message for the day). So, yesterday, I go over to the new house on my way to work to check on things and when I walk out the back door (this being the same door I walked in) I notice there's a cable drooping into the yard. I follow the line of the cable and (finally) notice that there's a really big tree limb that's fallen into the back yard.
Now, there hasn't been a storm or anything and this is a Really Big tree limb so not only do I need to get rid of this big tree limb but I'm a bit worried about the really big tree that it fell off of. Luckily, though it fell across the fence, it didn't do any damage to the fence, so that's a good thing. And the cable that it fell on turns out to be the television cable so that's also good.
So, I go to work and I call a tree removal service and say, can you go over to my new house and tell me what it's going to cost to get rid of this Really Big tree limb and also look at the tree it came off and tell me whether there are going to be more Really Big tree limbs falling off, or maybe like the whole tree falling down.
So, the tree guy goes over and he looks at the Really Big tree limb and the tree it came off and he calls me back and says, that tree is fine--it's not a very good tree, but it's healthy and it's not going to fall down. However, this other--even bigger tree--which is right in your front driveway, right next to your house.....That tree is, like, all hollow and very dangerous and should come down right now if not sooner (in fact, later in our conversation he admits that if it were his tree he wouldn't even want to wait until after the weekend). So I say, oh crap and let me think about it and ok fine just do it (which is about the time he tells me about the not waiting until Monday part).
This morning they brought a bucket truck and a big (and by big I mean really big) boom truck and a chipper and some other truck the function of which I'm not certain. I was gone most of the day but Billie and I walked over there about seven to see how it was going and they had the bucket truck in my driveway and the boom truck in my neighbor's yard and (I swear to god) they had taken down half my neighbor's fence to get the boom truck where they wanted it. They were still there working because, said the crew member I talked to, they wanted to be sure all the dangerous tree parts were done and then they'd finish up tomorrow. While I was watching they took off a limb the size of a medium-sized tree and swung it out over my (new) neighbor's yard--at which point I couldn't bear to watch anymore. I thought, my god, my neighbor is going to hate me with the hate of a thousand suns.
Billie and I continued with our walk and when I got home there was a message from the tree guy and he told me what the guy I talked to at the house told me. He also told me that my neighbor, in fact, loves me because he's been wanting the last four people who owned that house to take out that tree and finally someone actually did it.
We--me, the tree guy, his crew, and probably my new neighbor, although I haven't actually talked to him--think that this is, like, the luckiest thing ever because if I hadn't called them to get rid of the tree limb in my back yard I probably would have put off having anyone look at that tree and it would have fallen on either my house, my neighbor's house or my garage, probably in the winter and probably when it was, like, twenty below outside.
Meanwhile, the Really Big tree limb in the back yard, which started it all, is still there because, you know, it's not actually going anywhere and has already pretty much done all the falling it's going to do.
I haven't sold my current house yet, which has a lot to do with when I move into the new house, but when I was over at the new house today, I photographed a walking tour of the place (check it out).
I forgot to take pictures of the attic and the basement so you don't get to see the Scary Door (which, sadly, turns out not to be that scary), but pretty much everything else is there.
Tomorrow morning, I'm closing on my new house. My current house has been on the market just over a week. I've gotten great feedback from realtors, but no one's made me an offer yet. I love this house. I've lived here for 19 years (yikes!) and I'm ready for someone else to love it now.
I'm not worried about selling this house (at least not yet). I've already had several people look at it so I know there's at least some interest out there. My realtor thinks it should sell within a month which would be excellent. But I can't fully embrace the new house until I know I don't have to worry about this one any more (and mow two lawns and pay two mortgages and...)
On the new house, the soon-to-be-former owner called yesterday and asked if I wanted to go through the house with him. It's clear that they loved the house and were very sorry to go and it's really very clear that they put a lot more into the house than is reflected in the price I paid. The new house is nearly the exact same age as my current house--it's like the grown-up version.
Pictures maybe this weekend...
If you have any sort of choice in the matter, don't clean out your attic on any day when it's going to be OMG hot all day, particularly when it involves handling fiberglass insulation.
But the really crappy part is done--I just need to sweep the stairs and a little bit in the attic--later. And I've taken my first (but almost certainly not my last) shower of the day so I am going to be optimistic and hope that will take care of the fiberglass (even though it probably won't). The rest of the day will be clean-up, pack-up, and, almost inevitably make a trip to Lowes.
But right now I'm going to sit down and watch Pinky and the Brain
sallytuppence talks about doing some ruthless cutting on her novel and I've been doing some ruthless cutting at my house. It's going on the market on Monday.
This past Monday the realtor came and among her suggestions, she said remove every thing. Basically, you get to have one item on each surface and totally clean surfaces are also good.
She also suggested I turn my dining room back into a dining room:
Previously, I think it might most accurately have been referred to as 'a very wide hallway with lots of clutter.'
Except for the fact that it's dirty and a lot of work, I have enjoyed putting my house back in order. It really is a very nice house.
I'll post more pictures when it's all bright and shiny (you have to wait for new house pictures until I actually move in there).
Since making the offer on my new house not quite two weeks ago, I have:
--Ripped out carpet in two rooms
--Cleaned out the basement
--Painted the porch
--Cleaned the garage
--Trimmed the hedges and chopped down a tree (okay, really other people did this part)
--Cleaned out cupboards
--Put new hardware on drawers
--Been to Lowes an infinite number of times (just for example--buying six new knobs for two drawers and two cupboard doors required three trips to Lowes and two trips to Ace Hardware)
I think I am drawing close to the point where I can put my current house on the market; I'll have the realtor come by tomorrow or Tuesday and see what's left to bne done.
And, seriously, this is why someone should buy my house:
Best. Fireplace. Ever.
Pulling up old carpeting?
Definitely not the most fun you can have with your clothes on.
...This week I bought a new house.
You should all go ohhh and ahhh at it before the pictures go away.
When you leave a message asking for help, we cannot actually use our Secrit Mental Powers to determine your phone number.
People: How come you don't have computers set up in this room?
Me: Because you never told me you needed computers set up in that room.
People: Well, we totally do.
Or,
People: How come you set up computers in this room instead of this other room?
Me: Because you said: set up computers in this room.
People: Well, we were wrong.
I've been looking for a new house on and off since last March. This is my record so far:
--House on the market for 2 months. The second time I go to look at it someone else arrives to look at it while I'm there and puts in an offer on the spot. This house was totally my dream house, but the people who bought it paid more than I could have reasonably afforded to pay for it.
--House on the market for a month. I go to see it three times (because it's a nice house, but the yard isn't perfect). I put in an offer. The owners refuse to sell it to me. Two months later they sell it for exactly what I offered them (this turned out to actually be good for me because two weeks after I put in that offer John Henry broke his leg and thank god I wasn't trying to move, but still...)
--House on the market for a month. I go to see it twice. Small but very nice, needs a few improvements. Very affordably priced (but not for everyone, for one thing there is no shower anywhere in the house and no way to put one in except to add a whole new bathroom). Yesterday, I put an offer on it. Someone else put an offer on it five hours earlier.
This does not count the houses I looked at but didn't put offers on. Last year the market was fairly hot, but this year it is very slow. There are something like twice as many houses on the market as there usually are this time of year. People need to stop buying my houses.
That except for shelves and cupboards, I use the following pieces of furniture in my house: desk chair desk, couch, bed.
So, really, I could get along with a lot less furniture than I currently have.
Because I am getting upwards of 800 attempts to post spam comments a day (gee, what would it be like if this blog were actually read by more than fifteen or so people) I have instituted a feature that sends everything to moderation if there are any links (including the link that you put in the URL request box). If you don't include links you should still go right through.
Sorry, but it's like having hordes of rodents constantly trying to get over your fence and into your back yard.
I have been looking at this all day and find it utterly fascinating.
The photographs are from a project to photograph one hundred 100 square foot flats in Hong Kong's oldest public housing projects.
It doesn't surprise me that people can live in a 10 x 10 foot room--bedroom, living room, kitchen, everything. I am fascinated by the ways in which each room is deeply personal as well as the things they have in common (television, fan, bunk beds, wall clock).
I have cancelled my hotel reservation for Wiscon and I won't be going this weekend :-(
I will miss finally meeting people I know online and I'm sure it will be fun for all. I decided that I've had the dogs in the kennel twice this month already . Both of them have been sick (John Henry while not at the kennel and Billie at the kennel--though not because she was at the kennel). They're both fine now, but Billie has had a couple of small seizures this last week and I think (in my crackpot theory way) that being sick messed up her medication balances and it's taken her a bit to get back on track again. And now I want her to stay on track for awhile.
Anyway, have fun. Send me many links to pictures and descriptions of the many great things you are all doing. I will post pictures of my dogs and maybe get some writing done.
Seventy to ninety trains a day go through Ames, IA. When I tell people this--including people who actually live in Ames--they hardly ever believe me, but it's true. There are two different sets of train tracks so really, that's only about three trains an hour on each track, twenty-four hours a day. This morning when I was sitting in the park with Billie, five trains went through in the space of forty minutes. Sometimes there are two trains at once, which is a bitch if you're running errands at lunch and you have to sit through two entire trains. There are very few over/underpasses. Most of the crossings are at-grade. There are actually very few accidents--and this, even though one of the crossings has a fairly nasty traffic flow.
But, when I'm driving through town, one of my decision points is when to cross the railroad tracks--if I can go one way and cross right away and a different way and cross later, I will always choose to cross right away because odds are if I wait, there will be a train.
ME: I sent my check six days before it was due and you charged me a late fee. What's up with that?
THEM: Well, really it was only five working days
[Note from me: well, really not because the USPS actually works on Saturday].
THEM: And, plus, it takes six to eight working days for your payment to get to us.
ME: It takes six to eight working days for mail to get from Iowa to Missouri?
THEM: Yes.
ME: You've got to be kidding me.
THEM: Oh no, it's totally true.
ME: If I send mail to a person's house in St. Louis it takes, like, two to three days.
THEM: Well, it takes six to eight days to get to us.
ME: So, do you, like, let it sit around in a room for four or five days?
THEM: Absolutely not. It takes six to eight days to be delivered to us.
ME: So it takes longer to deliver mail to a business than to a residence?
THEM: Apparently [No, really, she actually said this part]
ME: How would I know this totally out-of-whack and unpredictable thing?
THEM: You should call us and ask us.
ME: Why would I expect mail to you to be totally out of whack with the entire rest of the world and therefore know that I should call you and ask you how totally out of whack your mail delivery is?
THEM: Well, you should pay over the phone or online.
ME: I can't pay online because your webpage is totally hosed up.
THEM: That's a feature. It's for your security.
ME: Well, it's totally working.
To her credit she was a) reasonably nice to me the whole time even when I was laughing at her mail delivery statistics and b) agreed to waive the late fee--just this one time, you understand because now I totally know that it takes days and days for mail to travel to St. Louis.
I find this most frustrating because this is my credit union credit card and my credit union used to have the Best Credit Card Ever. It had no rewards, no special promotions, no cool shiny things. It also was not trying to make all its money off charging me stupid and outrageous fees, messing with the due date (the